Baby blues

Something new is what I crave. A change in my simple day. My life has become a chore, some what of a bore. Although I love what I have, I seem to be nothing but sad. In my heart I know that is wrong. I hope this feeling will soon be gone, for I know I am blessed. All I have to do is look down at this sweet little boy, lying on my chest. Cassandra Dilbeck June 28, 2012

A new feeling

There is a certain happiness that comes and goes. This feeling is one I thought I would never know. Baby bumps getting bigger and I am getting sick. Please let this 9 months go by quick. I can not wait to see what's in there, meet him or her for the first time. I want a baby girl but a boy would be just fine. I hope I am good at this, alone I will try.

Life changing month

What is in store for me? Who can say... The happiness I once had has steadily drifted away. I try to go on but my interest have gone astray. I smile, laugh, and act like it is OK but the truth is I feel like I can not live another day. Cassandra Dilbeck November 1, 2011

Pain in the heart

Building this wall back up, brick by brick. Trying not to think of things because it makes me sick. I guess I was not good enough, although that was known from the start. Why the hell was I so willing to give this guy my heart? Cassandra Dilbeck October 4, 2011

Nieve girl

She looked out in the world with nieve glazed eyes. Did not see that the grandma was a wolf in disguise. She told herself that this was something real. Maybe she just wanted a change, maybe just to feel. Always seeing the good because she had never experienced the worst. Think goodness that she did not, put the wolf first. Every lesson learned changes who she is, builds her wall up higher and makes it harder to trust and forgive. Now she sits here, embarrassed and confused. Good thing that she did not let herself get used. Cassandra Dilbeck February 25, 2011

Life is what you make of it

Letting this life pass me by, my body and soul staying at a high. Life is what you make of it, was always what I was told. Them fucken silver tinted clouds, should have been made of gold. I watch people around me and it hurts me to know, that when times get hard they let it all go. Life is what you make of it, now isn't that the truth. I chose this road I am traveling and am ready to take the abuse. You probably don't understand this, I don't expect you to. Poems are for the heart and only really you. Time is at a stand still, well at least that's the way it seems. I feel like everything I was going for was just a stupid dream. Cassandra Dilbeck November 10, 2010

Optimism

Optimism is hard to keep, when my insides begin to weep. I try to keep it together but then I fall apart. I try to optimistic but it is hard to do with a heavy heart. I try to be optimistic, I smile instead of frown. I put a different face on for everyone around. I try to be optimistic, I give it my best each day but still I feel this hole inside me and can not get it to go away. Cassandra Dilbeck 2008